**Weird Things We Do And Think About Everday!!!**

If you find this in anyway like your lifestyle and how you live or things you think about or if it just plain out makes you laugh and you think yeah that's so me too, please rate this guide as helpful and add through gements things I left out that you ponder about.*-I check behind the shower curtain when I go in the bathroom.*-I run up the stairs because I think someone is chasing me.*-I try to watch ONE fan blade when the ceiling fan is on.*-I sleep with my closet doors closed.*-I don't sleep with my feet hanging off the bed because I think something is going to grab me.*-I hate it when the seat belts lock and I feel like I'm imprisoned withing their grasp or stuck and can't move.*-I try to cross lanes without hitting the bumps when I drive.*-When I'm walking around places and someone walks in my lane and I have to plan if I'm to go left or right. So I usually go right and they do the same, then step left and they counter me perfectly, then there's that slight pause and I let them bye and think "Gosh...what a difficult person..." as I walk on.*-When I'm having an awesome dream and right before anything good happens someone or some outside force wakes me up, and then I try to pretend I'm asleep and put myself in the same situation but it never works...unless it's like a nightmare which no one wants.*-I hate it when I'm eating some cookies with a glass of milk and I dip my cookie in the milk and it breaks in half and goes to the bottom of my cup. So now I'm left with the dry half AND on top of that I know have to dip my hand in the milky abyss and retrieve the lost soldier or I have to wait until the end and possibly sacrifice his life by drowning.*-I hate when I'm enjoying a nice drink or refreshment as I call it and theres just a bit left and the ice is chilling there on top. And as I go to sip my drink the ice bombards me and hits me in the face, which never hurts but only scares me because I never know when it planning to attack me.*-I dislike when I walks through a spider-web and it's like OMG! So then you have to peel off the sticky INVISIBLE web and face the feeling that the spider is on me planning its strategy on how to bite me which is definitely no bueno.*-I hate it when I'm trying to kill a bug and it gets away because I always think, "Dang he's going to murder me now."*-You know when your just sitting in church chilling and you have to stand up and start singing and sometime you don't want to but do anyways and pretend to sing the song and go along with it...but then there's always that one person in church who feels like they have to sing the best they ever have in their life. I mean your standing their humming and mumbling and you got American Idol going on in the background, it's kind of sad though because sometimes I look at the schedule to see where we are in the mass to see how close we are to getting out.*-I hate when my hair gets caught in my headphones so then I got to rip it out and it feels like I'm taking chunks of hair out which hurts a lot.*-I hate when I'm chewing bubble gum and you blow the biggest bubble in the world, and of course it pops, but then it explodes all over your face and is sticky and no matter what the only way to get it off is to take the gum thats in your mouth and dab the areas which it exploded.*-When I'm making that delicious Easy-Mac and after 4 minutes in the microwave the bowl is very hot like it was just dipped in magma, and so I grab it an hurry while run across the kitchen to go set it down while my hands are melting off and then you know when you sit it down you shake your hand furiously and it makes that weird sound when you hurt your fingers or hands...kinda like "ssssshhlllssshlhhhsslhlhllll" like a snake with a lisp...like the sloppy s noise.*-I hate how peanut butter always gets on top of the knife, even if your being super careful and watch it the whole way through once you turn for a second it's there on top as if it jumped in the peanut butter, threw a party, and came out while you turned or something.*-I hate trying to get off a shirt thats soaking wet because it feels like it's stuck or has morphed into your skin and when you finally get it off before you think your about to die, you throw it on the ground and start yelling YeeHaaaaaawwwhhh!!!*-It's kind of bad because I always try to gepare people I see to an animal they look like, most beautiful but a few...not so much.*-I always try to write my name on foggy windows in a real cool way but in the end it looks like you were having a seizure while doing it or wrote with your opposite hand.*-I NEVER EVER shampoo with my eyes closed because of the fact that if i close them, a monster might gee upon the re-opening of my eyes, so what I do is tilt my head and shampoo really fast while using my peripheral vision and sometimes I close my eyes but only for a split second which isn't enough time for a monster to form and murder me.*-Also, when showering sometimes I open the glass door to check behind the curtains to make sure nobody or anything is waiting there for me to get out and be like HAHAHA!!! and kill me or scare me until I faint and have a seizure.*-I hate when your eyes are all use to the light and then *BAM* they go off and your eyes dilute and it hurts really bad, also I hate when it's vice versa and your use to darkness then someone is like oh yea? Well now what!!! and flip the switch sending your head and vision into a swirling vortex for about 30 seconds.*-So like whenever I'm by myself and alone and something weird happens to me, like I trip or fall or something, I think ghosts are sitting around laughing at me and they set it up to have an eventful and enjoying time, so then I start thinking and talking to myself like, "Enjoy it while you can losers..."*-I can't stand when it says to heat something for about 20 seconds and you do and it gees out cold and your like dang! so you put it back in or you press the minute button and say ok, I'll stop it at 40 seconds, but then you forget and either method both always gee out burnt or not how you like it and you think Gosh...can nothing be perfect?*-Whenever I'm in a pool I always think there's a shark or alligator that's chasing me on my way out of the pool.*-When ever I'm in the hallway of a hotel or long corridor by myself I always think a guy is going to pop out of a wall or bust down a door and have a chainsaw running like 100 MPH towards me.*-Whenever I get a stuffy nose and can't breathe out it, I always think about movies where people get their mouth ducktaped and I'm always like...If that happened to me I'd suffocate because I couldn't tell the robber," Hey dude look I can't breathe out my nose", so when I get a stuffy nose I cover my mouth for practice testing and then I'm like yea haha I'd be dead.*-I hate when your in the car and trying to nap but something always stabs you in the back like a seatbelt. And it's one of those things you try to adjust and rotate, but it doesn't work which then your angry because you can't sleep and you just got beat by an inanimate object.*-I never like talking in a room that echoes solely for the infamous "Bathroom Echo". But sometimes you have to take that one important call and you both know there's that echo but you have to ignore it because you don't want to bring it up so you think, "Is this guy talking to me while he's taking a dump?"*-I absolutely hate it when I'm texting somebody which I do all the time and your getting all into the message and super fast then...some "intruder" as I call them texts you and it's always at that point something of no meaning like "hey" or "what's up?", so then I have to exit that one go to my saved drafts and start back up slow on the previous text which sometimes I'm like, "Where was I going with this one?" and I lose my train of thought, so then I get frustrated and I'm like it's that intruders fault, so I punish the intruder by not responding for a few minutes, unless it actually was something important.*-I hate it when you cut your finger or something and it doesn't bother you at all until you have to wash it or use the shampoo...because then you have to use that one finger up to shampoo and you think of the good old days when your finger was healthy.*-The best thing other than an orgasm or getting that one terribly annoying sneeze out is when that little reserve of water in your ear after you swim or something gees out when you lay down on a pillow or something. Because you try everything to get it out but all it takes is some relaxing and it just flows out and feels like it's massaging your ear on the way out, it feels great.*-My favorite is when your having a party with a bunch of friends and your in a room and it gees to that point where you figure out where your going to sleep, which we always think where's the safest place for me and then either think it in our head or call out loud to everyone where we're going to be. We always think like "Yeah, that's the best spot because when the killer gees through the door he'll murder Johnny and that will give me just enough time to run" and when we don't get that spot we want to ourselves we always make an alternate idea to assure us like, "Oh, well the killer is going to gee through the window anyways like all good murders do and then I'll run out the door while he's hacking Suzie into little pieces." Maybe not that much in depth, but you get the jist of it.Again, if this was funny or depicts you in anyway, I'd appreciate if you took a second to click "YES" under "Was this Guide Helpful?" THANK YOU!!!